My dad passed away 16 years ago on October 1, 2009 six months after a heart transplant. His last stay in the hospital lasted two and a half weeks. One of the ways I honored his memory was by remembering Paris Thomas, a security guard at New York-Presbyterian Hospital.

Grief can take many forms. The most familiar is when we are faced with the loss of a loved one. There are rituals of mourning, familiar ways of providing comfort and an accepted and understood common language that we use to show our support. What about when we grieve the loss of an Identity? Or the loss of a Relationship? A Job? A Dream? Although the emotions might be similar, there are often no rituals, no common language.

Pictures, videos, memory boxes—these are all that remain of my daughter Adaya, and sometimes, they hold her echo so vividly that they break me all over again.